Alexandria, better known as Alex or The Solo Date Plug, is the founder of Smitten Over Self, a brand rooted in the belief that enjoying your own company is an art and that the best love story starts with you.
Her journey into self love didn’t begin confidently. For much of her life, she struggled with deep codependency and relied heavily on external validation, particularly from romantic relationships, to feel secure and worthy. Being alone once felt so unfamiliar and overwhelming that even small moments of independence brought anxiety. Solitude wasn’t comforting for her at all. It felt unsafe.
In 2021, the end of an extremely volatile 3 1/2 year relationship became the turning point that changed everything. With her identity deeply intertwined with her partner, Alex was left not only grieving the relationship but grieving herself. She had lost touch with who she was outside of being chosen, partnered, and needed. With little to no hobbies of her own, limited community, and no sense of self apart from the relationship, she was forced to rebuild from the ground up.
What began as survival slowly transformed into self-discovery.
By intentionally challenging herself to do things alone, first small, then expansive, Alex began reconnecting with herself in ways she never had before. Solo dates became more than activities. They became tools for confidence, clarity, and healing. Through time spent alone, she learned how to set boundaries, trust her discernment, and make choices rooted in desire rather than urgency or fear of being alone.
Today, Alex stands confident as a single woman in her thirties, not because she has turned away from love but because she now knows who she is without receiving it from someone else romantically. She believes deeply in romance, connection, and partnership and proudly considers herself a lover girl at heart. Her love for 90s R&B, rom-coms, and romance novels lives right alongside her commitment to never abandoning herself again.
Smitten Over Self was born from this evolution. It is a reflection of what happens when a woman finds solace in solitude, steps outside her comfort zone, and learns how to give herself the care, experiences, and love she once waited for from others.
Through solo date storytelling, intentional experiences, and honest reflection, Alex now helps other women build confidence, strengthen boundaries, and fall for themselves in ways that are healthy, grounded, and deeply fulfilling.
Even when real love and her person finds her, one thing will remain true. She will always continue dating herself as well and she invites other women to do the same.
about SOS
Smitten Over Self began as a personal exploration of solitude and grew into a space for women who want to experience their lives with more intention, confidence, and self-trust. It was created for women who are learning how to be with themselves fully, not as a last resort but as a meaningful and fulfilling choice.
​
At its core, Smitten Over Self centers the idea that solitude can be a place of solace rather than something to avoid. When chosen intentionally, time alone becomes space to listen inward, build confidence, and reconnect with who you are beneath expectations, noise, and outside validation. This brand invites women to see their alone time not as emptiness but as an opportunity for clarity, grounding, and self-connection.
​
Solo dates are one of the primary ways this philosophy comes to life. Spending time alone, trying new things, and showing up for yourself builds confidence through experience. It teaches you how to trust your decisions, honor your boundaries, and move through the world without needing permission or reassurance from others. Over time, choosing yourself in small, intentional ways creates a stronger sense of self and a deeper belief in your own capability.
​
Learning how to enjoy your own company also shifts how choices are made. Instead of acting from urgency, fear, or the need to fill space, women begin to choose from a place of desire, discernment, and alignment. You learn that you can give yourself the care, attention, and experiences you deserve, without waiting for someone else to provide them.
​
Smitten Over Self is rooted in the belief that the best love story starts with you. It is about building a life that feels full and intentional right now, not someday. A life where choosing yourself feels natural, grounded, and deeply affirming.
​
This safe space exists to offer ideas, perspective, and encouragement for women who want to live more deliberately and cultivate a strong, steady relationship with themselves. Here, self-love is not rushed nor is it performative. It’s practiced in real time, shaped through experience, and allowed to evolve. Choosing yourself becomes less of a declaration and more of a way of moving through the world.
​
I’m not here to teach you how to be alone forever, girl. I’m here to teach you how to enjoy yourself in the meantime so you’ll have the tools you need to continue doing so even when you fall for someone other than yourself.